The lineups and coaching staff have been determined after a vigorous
off season conditioning and training regimine. We are hoping to double the amount of fans this season to bring
in some extra income so we can pay Big Pete's salary.
Team Bueno stockholders are encouraged after 2008 almost took us into the finals
and hopefully 2009 will be the year that Bueno brings home the gold!
Team Bueno Coaching Staff
Owner: Red Coach Realty
Although real estate is in the toilet, this company has stood tall behind
their biggest asset in Team Bueno. 2008 brought lots of clutch W's and a few heartwrenching losses, but it also
brought Team Bueno out of the RED and into the BLACK
in the accounting department.
General Manager: Pazz
He was ousted in 2008 as the Manager, but remained the GM only due to his
father owning 85% of the team, but he pulled through by keeping the Manager in the Bueno family by signing Joe Bolino to manager
for '08 and boy did it pay dividends.
2009 Manager: Joe
Joe really proved his worth in his 1st year as Manager of Team Bueno by bringing
them 1 win away from a finals berth. It all started out as a joke when Joe was signed as Manager, but it ended
up being a great choice and he earned himself a 2 year extension worth an undisclosed amount. Although most
around the clubhouse believe it to be a gallon of Richardson's chocolate ice cream and a monthly dinner at Petrillo's
in Peabody.
2009 Scout: Sheehan & Trainor
Once again these two brought in players with the snap of a carrot. The
biggest acquisitions had to be Franco & Ryan Sheehan from Scout Sheehan & Smiley from Scout Trainor.
These players are high quality and will be called up from the minors in 2009.
2009 Hitting Coach: Kootch
Kootch may have lost some power last season, but we at Bueno are chalking that
up to an aberation. So, we will undoubtedly see Kootch hitting for power and glory in '09.
2009 Pitching Coach: Joe Bolino
Although Joe is one of the worst pitchers to step foot on a mound he is still the
manager and a manager must do what it takes to take his team to the top. Basically, Bueno could not find a soul to teach
Josh how to pitch to certain hitters so we just appointed Joe as the Pitching Coach.
2009 Baserunning Coach: Chuck & Josh
Chuck was the Baserunning Coach in 2008 and he did a phenomonal job of showing
everyone how not to run. So, Bueno management thought they might as well add one more terrible baserunner as a coach.
Josh will help in showing how to not care one bit about running when the option to lightly jog around the bases is still out
there.
Other Available Positions Include:
1. Equipment Manager - Unfortunately Andy Dietz was not around
as hoped in 2008, so Bueno figured that GM Pazz can handle carrying a 30 lb bat bag, a practice bat, another extra bat, and
scorebook to name a few things.
2. Director of Player Development - We can't seem to find a
single person willing to help this team progress into All-Stars or at least players worth watching. The Hanson Brothers
from Slapshot were thought to be frontrunners, but upper management nixed that idea when they remembered that the only thing
those guys could do was wrap their fists with tin foil and fight.
3. Director of Snacks - Beef is going to become the first
Director of Snacks in Team Bueno history due to his knowledge in how to make a pizza.
Manager Joe has created a lineup that very well may be the best in Bueno history,
let's hope that they don't listen to his basecoaching skills though
2009 Lineup:
1. Chuck SS/2B/OF
He will be moved back to SS this season
in an effort by management to strengthen the infield. His baserunning skills still remind everyone of a mentally
challenged Manny Ramirez. Had the best total batting average on the team. He had claimed that he had the best
average in 2006, but was clearly incorrect. He finally can claim that his average was better than everyone.
Contract Status: 1 yr. / $8.25
His lineup spot changes from game to game, but it only helps management
strengthen the lineup when we need players at the top or bottom of the lineup.
2. Sheehan LF/RP/3B/SS
5 tool player, plays every position, has the arm
strength of a bear and the accuracy of a blind archer. Runner up for theMVP in 2007. Struggled in '08,
but was terrific down the stretch. Management wants consistency out of him in 2009 or it might be time for a change
of scenery.
Contract Status: 2 yrs. / $22
Will be on his A game in '09.
3. Franco OF
Signed a letter of intent in the off-season and was hoping to be a big part of
Team Bueno in 2009 as a starting OF, but unfortuantely it looks like he will be called up on a baseball team. However,
he did bring an enormous spark in the field and at bat for Team Bueno in 2008, hit a Grand Slam in a playoff game.
His play if identical to Carlos Beltran of the '06 Playoffs.
Contract Status: 1 yr. / $10
4. Pete 1B/3B
Biggest off-season move in Bueno history. The signing of Big Pete should hopefully
bolster Bueno up to the top. He is a hitting machine up at the plate.
Contract Status: 2 yrs. / $22
5. Ryan Sheehan 3B/1B/OF
Brings a winning attitude to Team Bueno, not to mention a bat with some pop off the
bench. Was signed to a multi-year deal after the '08 season to be an integral part of the 2009 Team Bueno season.
Contract Status: 4 yrs. / $10
6. Kootch C/OF
He has one of the purest swings
since Ken Griffey Jr., has had more surgeries then years on this planet, bum hamstring has him turning a 500 ft. homerun into
a 500 ft. single. Went to the motherland of Ireland in the '08 off-season to regroup his mind for the season. 2007
MVB. 2008 was a slight change of pace for Kootch, his homerun total dipped and his singles total exploded. He
needs to find his swing once again or Bueno may very well trade him for prospects. 2009 will be a big test for the usual
clean-up hitter as he has been thrown down to the 6th spot.
Contract Status: 1 yr. / $12
Brand new contract and this time the team did not
allow for a no trade clause.
7. Beef 1B/OF/C
Fundamental swing, usually the team leader in doubles, team doctors worry that he may
break his hip during his swing as he did in high school. Is the only starting infielder left on the team from
2007. His regular season average pre-all-star game are unbelievable, but his post-all-star game average is something
that he would like to have burned.
Contract Status: 1 yr. / $7.5
His batting average was off the charts in '08
8. Trainor RF/2B
He came back from an injury plagued 2006 season and
was the most improved player in 2007 due to a ridiculous month in where he was a homerun away from the cycle and made
an unreal catch during a game. Will need to bring his leadership to RF if this team is ready to take the next step towards
the championship. Clearly had a career year in 2008 and was rewarded by being named the 1st ever All-Star in Bueno
history and the '08 MVB.
Contract Status: 2 yrs. / $16
Unbelievable 2008, Bueno is hoping it carries over
to '09 unless he tests positive for steroids.
Ace of the pitching staff, gets
rattled easily though, needs to keep composure after errors are committed in the field, his famous quote "Let the razor do
the work" will be history as Bueno finally has 3 new bats to get his run support up. Has drawn comparisons
to Greg Maddux for his ability to paint the black on some days and John"Way Back" Wasdin when he lets up the big
bomb on other days. Division 2 was slightly easier on his ERA in '08. If he doesn't stop giving up the
longball in '09 he very well may be sent to the minors to find that golden touch from '06.
Contract Status: 1 yrs. / $9.5
Still has the biggest contract a slowpitch softball
pitcher has ever recorded.
10. Davey 2B
Has been a great addition to Team Bueno in the field.
He brought a fire to Bueno in 2008 and pushed us into the playoffs. 2009 may bring his 1st Gold Glove and Silver
Slugger Awards.
Contract Status: 3 yrs. / $17
He earned his new contract with his glove and his
bat in '08. If he can reproduce that in '09 Bueno will be in for a fantastic season.
11. "C" Pazz CF/2B
The captain of Team Bueno has been dropped in the order due to high obesity problem
from 2008. He has since dropped some weight and is awaiting his call to the leadoff position once again. But,
until then he will sit back and watch the juggernauts at the top of the lineup do some major damage. However, he still
does complain about everything & no curse word is off limits in his vocabulary (suspended for one
game for telling umpire Brian to "Suck My A**hole"). Must contain his emotions for the simple reason that he is one
wild tyrade from a massive heart attack. Was officially been named the 1st ever Captain of Team Bueno in '08.
Contract Status: 1 yrs. / $9
Unless he gets fired as GM.
12. Joe MF
In his 1st year as manager for Team Bueno, Joe, has
already laid down the law moving the lineup around and handing out a captaincy to CF Pazz. He took Bueno to 1 victory
away from the finals in '08. 2009 will only be tougher on Team Bueno as Joe's idea of a great practice is sitting back
and watching Sportscenter while eating a sundae (without cherries because god forbid Joe eats a cherry and breaks his supposed
record of 27 years of never eating a friggen cherry).
Contract Status: 2 yrs. / $10.67
He continually talks about resigning. His lackadaisical
attitude is apparently the spark Bueno needed.
1. Teddy RF/C
2006 Mid-season acquisition, claimed off waivers, has brought a high OBP and SLG% to
Team Bueno in times of need, doesn't know the meaning of pulling the ball. Held out for most of 2007 and all of
2008. Was called up in 2009 and has produced from the get go.
Contract Status: FA
Has said he would entertain
an offer, but is looking for more money then Bueno can afford.
2. Hurley OF
At 6 feet 7 inches John Hurley can rob a homerun over the Green Monster if need
be and possibly has the largest strike zone in all of slowpitch softball history. Opposing team's outfielders tend
to back up when he steps to the plate.
Contract Status: 1 yr. / $4
Has a new contract worth slightly less then last year,
but only due to his games played.
3. Dan 2B
Helped Team Bueno turn it's 1st double play of the season in Game 1 of the 2007 season.
Has a hunger for the game that goes unmatched and makes opposing pitchers ERAs explode when he makes contact.
Contract Status: FA
Has apparently left the team for a "Work League", but Team Bueno
would talk money if he came to the table first.
4. Mike Parz C
Reminds a lot of people of Doug Mirabelli because he's slow and has a little pop in
his bat, plus he can only catch the knuckleball, nothing else.
Contract Status: 1 yr. / $0.50
Has been demoted to A ball to hopefully remember how to
play softball.
5. Jeff C
That random kid that Chuck managed to pull off the street for the final game of the
2007 regular season. He was 2-2 with an RBI until he got the boot for being underage.
Contract Status: FA
6. Matt SS
A very consistent player, scooped off of the waiver wire during the Fall League and
filled in for the many abscent Buenos. No one is quite sure how he is even remotely related to Joe.
Contract Status: 1 yr. / $5
7. Jennings 2B/OF
Helped Bueno out in the Fall League, had a rough go of it in his 1st game by striking
out looking.
Contract Status: 1 yr. / $0.50 Minor League Deal
8. P.J. 1B
Showed up to a Fall League game in jeans and work boots,
that's all I have to say.
Contract Status: FA
DL Members:
2007 - Chris Pazz - 1 stint (1 Game/Separated Shoulder)
2008 - Chris Pazz - 1 stint (2 weeks/Lacerated Finger)
Other Members of Team Bueno
There are too many other players who have put in their hard earned
efforts to talk about, like Mike Parz wearing workboots during a game, Stanton gunning out the fat kid on Nino's at second
base in the playoffs, Hurley being the tallest player in league history, Justin Haskell wearing a wife beater, or
that kid named Mike that played catcher in jeans, but to all of you who have poured your blood, sweat,
& tears for Team Bueno
WE SALUTE YOU.
